The All Balls Award for Local Government Speak

Each year Jon and I delight in some of the 'Local Government / Third Sector Speak' which finds its way into ward newsletters (or doesn't find its way as Jon and I expunge it).  

I suspect incumbent councillors don't mean to do this, but they get so used to hearing plain English garbled through the mincing machine of bureaucratic blandness, that they accidentally fall into the same bad habits.

Last year's prize was won by an incumbent councillor who proudly informed her residents,

"I am pleased to report that I joined a group which formed a
committee with a view to taking action."

This year, even though it is only the second week in January, we have already identified a strong contender for the 2015 All Balls Award,

"Additionally, following concerns raised by residents, we advised and supported the successful securing and implementation of alternative strategies which might lead to containment." 

 I do wonder about table chat at their family Sunday lunch

"Excuse me, would you kindly enable the provision of sustenance by procuring the tureen of roasted potatoes and securing their conveyance to the top left hand corner of the table."